I Want To Be an Ant Farm.

"MAMA! He did it again!"

 When we were little, my brother had a fascination with ant hills. He couldn't stay away from them. He crouched down, watching the activity around the mound; he was fascinated. Then he would stomp on the mound. The only problem is that he didn't run away -- he would just stand there until the ants swarmed all over his feet and started biting him.

Our mom would swoop outside when she heard him crying, start tearing his clothes and shoes off, and turn on the water hose. Since he did it all the time, she had to figure out the fastest way to get the ants off, so she would literally hose him down.

We tried to make him stop. Our parents spanked him. I tried to keep an eye on him while we were playing, but by the time I realized what he was doing, it was usually too late.

I  always understood why he did it. Ants mesmerized me too. Instead of adventurously tramping through the yard getting up close and personal with the little insects, I dreamed of having an ant farm.

I remember seeing one on TV and asking my parents about it. I was amazed by the idea that a way existed to see what was going on underground. The ants seemed so busy; I was curious to see what they were doing. When I finally did see one, it lived up to my expectations. There were all these tiny tunnels with ants running around everywhere.

I want to be an ant farm.

When I meet people and interact with them, I want to be transparent. My hope is that if people can see me the way I really am, what's going on inside my heart and mind, they'll realize how God has transformed me and how he continues that work every day.

Most people don't think it's okay to show weakness or to admit mistakes. The crowd says, "Be tough. Be confident. Beat people up. Take what's yours. Look out for yourself because no one else will. I'm always right. My way is the best way." Well, I'm done following the crowd. There's a reason our moms always said, "If everyone else jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?"

In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul gives us some better advice.

And so I insist—and God backs me up on this—that there be no going along with the crowd, the empty-headed, mindless crowd. They’ve refused for so long to deal with God that they’ve lost touch not only with God but with reality itself. They can’t think straight anymore. Feeling no pain, they let themselves go in sexual obsession, addicted to every sort of perversion.  But that’s no life for you. You learned Christ! My assumption is that you have paid careful attention to him, been well instructed in the truth precisely as we have it in Jesus. Since, then, we do not have the excuse of ignorance, everything—and I do mean everything—connected with that old way of life has to go. It’s rotten through and through. Get rid of it! And then take on an entirely new way of life—a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside and working itself into your conduct as God accurately reproduces his character in you. (4:17-24 The Message)
 

I expect that people will notice when I'm not doing what unbelievers are doing, even if it's just little things. That's why I want to be like an ant farm.  When people examine my life, I want God's transforming work to be apparent. The change he's bringing about isn't just on the surface; it's deep inside. He's changing the very fabric of my being. He's not just cleaning up my public actions. He's giving me a new heart (Ezekiel 11:18-20).

Every minute, I get a little bit closer to being the woman God created me to be, and I hope seeing the change in me inspires others to trust him to do the same for them.



Image Credit: http://www.mykidsadventure.com/the-history-of-ant-farms/